Perdido

Me hiciste perder el tiempo
También me hiciste mejor 

Pero tengo que despedirme de ti

Handshake

If I believed in the devil
I'd tell you I've met him

He's a silver tongued liar

And the world's best salesman

I met the devil and he lives in my head

He tells me he's got answers

And he'll sell them to me for free

I met the devil and he shows me the truth

Distorted and bent like me

The solution's permanent and less than ideal

But he'll sell it to me for free

Mourning In The Reeds

My love was a cattail scattered to the wind when you disappeared
A soft but multitudinous explosion without a destination
Subject to chance alone and all too unrestrained
You left footprints in the mud of my affection
To be washed away into the floodplains of a lifetime of memories
The sheer aggregation ensuring your opacity fades to transparency
Like a beach subsumes the independence of each grain

Exquisite

Purified the only way you can be
By the loss of your other half
Now you are one, only one, just al-one
This is the finest pain ever experienced
A closer look reveals exquisite insight
Into the origin of your humanity
There is no forgery

Mangroves

My fear, baited like a fishook,
Places the fruit of anxiety with a pit of trepidations
Into the soil of my abdomen to nourish and grow
Fed by insecurities and self-directed cruelties
Whose roots will wend their way tortuously deep
Into my own egregore, twisting through foundational ontologies
And cracking the bedrock of my confidence.

Uncertainty

I grow forests of worries saturated by my tears
They bloom anxieties whose fruit
Is always overripe and so often bitter
I chop them down with my ax of reason
Sharpened on the stone rationale and wet with deliberation
Their trunks fall haphazardly tearing at
My faith on the way down, shattering my ease on impact
But no matter how many I burn
To sustain the warmth of self-compassion
There is still a forest of doubt before me.

Loss

Mediated by the unforgetful soma
It's too hard to convey
The devastation we weathered
That is your latest transmutation

Arroyo

Your love is a dry arroyo that for years sustained me 

And quenched my parched heart with your flashflood adoration

But now crumbles under the footsteps of my words

Greedy for traces of you.

Grief

I wasn’t ready for this trip.
It was unexpected, and I was unprepared.
And now this journey will color the months of my 30^th year
As I navigate how to undo what has been undone.

upset

[ verb, adjective uhp-set; noun uhp-set ]

verb (used without object), up·set, up·set·ting.

to become upset or overturned.