Can't Be Wrong

I'm so goddam stubborn
And I've wasted precious time
Loving others too much,
Too stubborn to let go
And learn when to quit,
Because concluding that
My love was wasted
Feels like a death sentence.
My stubbornness compels me
To prove that true love's kiss
Might be enough to convince Death
To let us love unparted and eternal.

A Brief Letter To The Villain

Dear Evil-Doer,
The short and short of it is that I am awesome now and I probably don't need you.
I'm busy finding happiness.  I don't I have time for the drama you'd bring.
Do you know what character you played in my story?  The villain.
You don't just waltz into my kingdom and think you can stay in it.  Not while I'm Queen.
Worst Regards,
Queen of Everything


----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
I think people are just stupid. It's hard having a brain, but I suppose it's hard to be stupid and know you're not gonna make it past Hair dresser.  I really do try to have compassion, but when they all start grating on my nerves at once, I start dreaming of Idiocracy, and I just lose it.  Then I start thinking about Huxley's Brave New World, and my inner human rights activist heads for the hills.  It's just all around bad news bears.

Yeah Unh!

Now that I dropped my baggage, I'm diminishing the laggage.
You see me coming in first; what can you do to quench your thirst?
I got my money, honey.  And it's a just a little funny, bunny.
I got no degree or loans, yet your dad still owns your bones.
So suck my cock, and don't let your jaw lock.
Because I'ma pound it in and out, as I fill you up with doubt.






The ghetto mini rap I made up walking from my car to the door.
Yeah mother fucker.  Suck on my imaginary huge enormous dick.  Good thing its not real otherwise I wouldn't be able to wear pants.  Yeah feminists do it better.



On a much more serious note,
Men have the power to ruin lives.  At least act like it affects you when you hurt someone, quickly before I lose hope in mankind.



Yeah, that ones is at you, candidates.


Note on 4.2.2012:
I can only imagine the queen from Oglaf.com reciting this.

What I Want To Say To You

You say you're going far and fast,
But you're a hare, and you're coming in last.
So drop that stupid attitude
Before you start into your platitude.
Do you know who you are fighting?
Consider just who you are indicting.
I have only got sour grapes
For you, so stand up straight.  You're not an ape.





This is dedicated to all the stupid fucking bitches (male, female and trans) in the world who never had a chance to listen to me tell them to STFU.
Much more eloquent and even more fuck you when you do it in poetry form.  Take that everyone who pisses me off!!


P.s. Dear readers, I am sorry I have been absent lately!  I tried to schedule enough entries so that I could make it through Valentine's day but it wasn't quite enough.  (I work in the flower trade so V-Day is THE day).  I'm back now with a vengeance!  And my lizard died so I'll be writing his elegy and posting it too.

No One Knows

She cries out

And no one hears her;

A radio broadcast

Without receivers.

A silent “MAYDAY!”
“MAN DOWN!  MAN DOWN!”

Jill went up as Jack went down.

No one knows he’s lost his crown.

She’s falling apart,

Inside out.

She fights herself,

She fights self doubt.

The fight unyielding,

Yet, death toll low,

But united she does not stand.

No one will know, she will not show.

Raise up that white flag;

Wind tears tattered bits.

Thunderous crashes of the sea,

Our lady is prone to fits.

A green lady, a lost symbol,

Falls to her cold knees.

Her crown cracks.

She grieves.

A meaningless banter,

The daily routine,

Once proud and respected

Now, cruel and mean.

Nitpick each word, each letter…

“It’s wrong!”  “Take it to court!”

Burn down our fort, it’s better.

White is the kettle.

White as the pot.

Her mindless anger

Is hot to trot.

She’s unzipping.

Her seems are ripping.

The coins are flipping.

Her spirits are dipping.

She does not know.

She has no help.

It might be better, if only she spoke.

The cards are dealt.

It’s not her fault.

It’s ours, not hers.

We’ve made her what she is.

We are everyone, but we throw racial slurs.

Centuries she’s been alive,

But still she’s young and bold.

But secrets, no child should know,

She keeps her lips shut, eyes cold.

She will not relent.

She plots against foes.

And still,

No one knows.

2006

Never been so disrespected

Ex wouldn't leave my house so I pushed him out the door (because when you are under 5'0 you cannot show 6'0 black belts any fear. they feed off fear) and he had the nerve to stick his foot in. He didn't pull it out (even after I slammed it twice) until I pulled out my cell to call the police.


However, there was a gem.
Last night's best quote: "HEY ASSHOLE." "Yeah?"

Thats right mother fucker. We're playing by my rules now.
Today I texted him about getting his shit out of the garage before I throw it away or burn it because if he calls the police I will have an eviction notice for him.
Here's an excerpt:
Speaking of mistakes, you left your mortar and pestle here which means you don't want it. So it's in the dumpster in case you change your mind.


Empower yourselves, women. Tell that douche bag that he did you wrong and you want him out. Then show him your beautiful lioness claws.

Next Big Thing

It's all the rage with the richest, most suave of southern California. Get this: Sidewalks are lame.
If you're getting in shape and want everyone to know, don't hide behind parked cars and the bike lane. Sidewalks are big enough for one and a half people, absolutely not two. And it has the hideous 3 inch buffer called a "curb." Now, if you're REALLY cool and want to be "safe" you're going to want to be able to see on coming cars, even around corners. So what you want to do is walk in the OPPOSITE direction of cars. Do NOT have your back to them, that would allow them to see you before you see them!

I hope all these retarded rich people get run over. They love running IN THE BIKE LANE (sometimes with THEIR DOGS or TWO people deep or any combination of the above). And their favorite game is to come around corners running towards oncoming traffic and bikers. Not only is asphalt worse for your knees than the sidewalk is, you're RUNNING IN THE STREET. Where are your mothers? In nursing homes because you're rich and you don't love her anymore. Living in such affluence shows you the nastiest side of humanity. Everyone just feels way too entitled.

Favorite quote from a rich dick who cut off people in his beamer: "Hey! I live here!"

So do I, fuckface.

ANGST...but not teenage angst!

I'm just anxious. I'm hanging out with my dad. It's so awkward sometimes. It feels like he's not listening or he's on another page or he wants to say something but can't or is just waiting to say his bit. It's just really weird meshy. Idk, he's a Western doctor who went to med school in like the 70s. So I mean you already know he's a baby boomer generation right there and a doctor? and he's Jewish. I mean you just keep putting down points in the nerd category. socially awkward. but he's my dad so I hang out. He insisted I go to hatha yoga with him. I hate hatha. It's realllllllllllllllyyyyyyy slow and you just pretty much nap for an hour in a hot room. I like ashtanga. You move. I have ADHD. That H in there makes a hell of a difference. when my brain is moving (at any speed) my body has to move too. That urge and need to move is the hyper part. I cannot stop twitching/shaking my foot even as I fall a sleep I sort of rub them together. I'm a fucking mess off my Ritalin but at least I'm awake and gigglicious. But he pretty much Jew guilted me into going to hatha yoga with him. Then he wants to eat after. I really dont want to be out till like 9. And I have the nagging suspicion he's going to bring up the noise violation my house was accused of the first night before my finals. Some one peed in the green belt and MY HOUSE got blamed. I didn't even get to have the fun of being drunk and getting in trouble. NO. I was STUDYING like a good studious Jewish girl, painfully off my meds. (Since my doctor wont prescribe me short acting ritalin I only have the 12 hr stuff and I would rather not take it at all). Oh and I have to give him the receipt for my brake change...since I used his card. I paid for the oil change. There was no way I could afford brakes and I pretty much ground them down to nothing. :/

Yeah So I'm anxious.
I'm all hyper and pent up and anxious.
And there is a hungry caterpillar in my garden who is eating all my sweet pea leaves and spinach leaves away. It wont be long before he destroys my passion vine!! All I know is that he's fat and hungry and knows how to hide. I'm offering a reward for his head.

And I just want a job. I had better luck today. Tomorrow I'm going to drive around and hand back apps and resumes. Wish me luck.

Update:
It was frustratingly boring. I'm sorry but I cannot sit in one pose for 5 minutes and have my eyes closed. Rude Boy just starts playing in my head and my foot starts shaking and my brain goes "STFU RIHANNA" and Rihanna just keeps singing the chorus over and over and over...

And I just got in a fight with my boyfriend and I honestly feel like I didn't really do anything wrong.

God this night is fucking ridiculous. I really thought it would be better than this.

I haven't been happy lately but I can't tell if its because I want a job so bad or if it's because my boyfriend has been cranky with finals or if we're in a rough spot. Too many variables. I want to let the air clear and little and look at stuff. Feeling anxious and on edge lately is unacceptable. I hope summer helps. I think it will.

...always with the optimism.